Matthew’s Mid-Month Moustache Memorandum

Matthew has been at this Movember thing for half a month now and, I must say, he has surpassed my very low expectations of his development. I had thought that seeing his moustache would require a Rosetta-like craft landing on his upper lip and beaming back close up pictures, but here it is visible to the naked eye. His fundraising is progressing well, but could do with a boost if you fancy donating to his Movember page, where you can also find lots of info on the issues of men’s physical and mental health.

Predictably enough, however, our warnings of facial hair prejudice proved accurate and Matthew has had a few jokes at his expense. If the beard has had something of a revival of late, the moustache is much harder to pull off (not in the literal sense, obviously). Maybe it is the moustache’s association with some of the 20th Century’s worst mass murderers or embarrassing memories those ‘dodgy tache’ pictures lurking in the photo albums of anyone with a father who lived through the 70s or 80s.

Nevertheless, as Matthew’s moustache develops further, thoughts must inevitably turn to styling and being the democratic sort of band that we are, we’d like your input on this. Have a look at the styles below and please vote for your favourite in our poll below. Matthew has agreed to be bound by your decision.

THE CHEVRON – A fairly straightforward moustache, well displayed here by 80s action man Tom Selleck.
THE PENCIL – A neat, refined and elegant moustache which may or may not work with shabby jeans and California T-shirts.
THE TOOTHBRUSH – This moustache went into inexplicable decline after the 1940s and is now only worn by crazed eccentrics.  Choosing this may get Matthew fired from his day job.
THE IMPERIAL – Only at the height of British power could a man wear such a ludicrous moustache with confidence.
THE HORSESHOE – or biker’s moustache, famously worn by the ‘leatherman’ from The Village People and Hulk Hogan.



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